OOH LA LA! #19
Nothing lasts too long, but pleasure has no limits and this moment is gorgeous
It’s the solstice today, an astronomical and astrological tipping point between darkness and light. Here in the northern hemisphere, the sun is at its highest point in the sky which means the daylight will be the longest today. After this day, the earth will slowly begin its tilt away from the sun as we descent into winter.
It always strikes me how we celebrate this high moment, forgetting it is also the beginning of turning away. Up and down, inhale then exhale, morning then night, the ebb and flow. It is good to remember that nothing, whether goodness or grief, night or day, summer or winter, lasts too long.
All we actually have is this moment.
And then this one.
And then this one.
With this remembering, I hold everything more loosely, and also cherish everything more fully. The future is only a mirage, and now knowing what will happen, I want to drink it all up. Not knowing what will happen, I choose to find the joy here now.
This week’s OOH LA LA! list includes: honey and coffee, the genuine love of friendship, a Mary Oliver poem that dropped into my mind in an instant, as if spoken from elsewhere.
My current morning routine includes pouring a double shot of espresso over a single large square ice cube, adding oat milk and then a long, slow squeeze of honey. I add a glass straw and then stir, the swirls of honey and coffee merging into one delicious, cold comfort, the sound of the straw on the glass a sort of singing bowl to start the day. Adding honey to coffee has transformed a beverage I already loved into a ritual I adore, and I think that says a lot about the limitlessness of pleasure and joy. If it is true that the things we love can become greater sources of goodness, then maybe I too can become a greater receiver of grace. How wonderful!
Perhaps more than any time in my life, I’m feeling held by the genuine love of friendship. I’m lucky to have friends with whom I can laugh with over dinner, cry to on the phone, and call late into the night. Even though my friends are separated by states and schedules, we find a way, and truly, is there not a more purer form of love and loyalty than this? My close friends tell me the truth and listen deeply, never tiring to hear about my life, even if I am endlessly saying the same things, trying to make sense of the complexities. We all deserve to be so lucky, to be not only be cherished, but also seen, and empowered to be and become our full selves. The love from my friends reflects back to me my own light, so in the end, we burn brighter together, and the whole world becomes softer by our love.
On Wednesday, I was feeling a bit lost and overwhelmed when a Mary Oliver poem dropped into my mind in an instant, as if spoken from elsewhere. The words came with such clarity and strength that my spine straightened and I tuned my ears to listen, though the words were only inside my head. “You do not have to be good,” I heard. Then the voice repeated, “you do not have to be good.” Tears came to my eyes. “You do not have to walk on your knees for a hundred miles through the desert repenting.” I am good at repenting. I am good at being good. And then I hear again, “You do not have to be good. You only have to let the soft animal of your body loves what it loves.“
One day I will write more about releasing good, for now, I’m still finding my way. What I know for sure is that this practice, this devotion to OOH LA LA! is waking me to new layers of joy, and if there’s any hope for our future, I believe this is the foundation. You do not have to be good. You only have to keep asking yourself what is the truest, most beautiful life you can imagine, and keep going toward that.
All we actually have is this moment.
And it is gorgeous.
Thanks for reading!
I’d love to know - what is an OOH LA LA something you experienced or observed this week?
Reply to this email with 1-3 sentences about your current obsessions, passions, joys, and pleasures and why you love it! Or, simply send me a poem or a photo!
XOXO,
LJ
“Whoever you are, no matter how lonely, the world offers itself to your imagination.” - Mary Oliver